Zak'isms: The Best of Zak Bagans


Happy Halloween/Samhain, y'all!

I thought we'd have a little giggle on Halloween by appreciating all that is special about Zak Bagans of "Ghost Adventures." I laugh at the show and have a weekly drinking game based on it, but honestly it's purely entertainment, not ghost hunting, so let's enjoy Zak's wonderful lines from some episodes that prove what an entertainer he is!

"I'm standing here with wax figures, some of whom are dead now." (Madam Tussad's Wax Museum in Vegas)

Ah, Zak, lambie, ALL of the wax figures are dead, dear.

"I'm gonna set it right here in between my legs because that's where I hear the incubus likes it best." (Rams Inn, England)

Ah, Zak sugar foot, the incubus (male ghost looking for sex) appreciates your accommodating his needs, dear.

"We hear you don't like people in here renovating this place...Why am I being like this to you? Because I don't like bullies! (The Riddle House)

I'm sorry to hear that, Zak, honey. Then, I suppose you're really hating on yourself about now, huh?

"I know what you did to that big guy earlier and I want you to do it to me...You wanna grab my ankles, go ahead!" (Wolfe Manor)

Oh, Twiddlebug, that's what you say to all dates in their apartments.


"This is a guard key...I'm to go open up all the doors and hopefully they will come out and try to kill the guards." (Eastern State Penn)

Zak, sweetums, the invisible ghosties aren't really locked in cells and there are no guards, dear. The prison is closed and has been for some time.

"If this is the portal of hell, why don't you come up out of the ground and get us?" (Bobby Mackeys)

Sweet cheeks, that's a well you're talking to. It leads to water. Satan has a bigger and more fiery entrance to his domain.


*Check out the newest zombie housewives post*

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